A couple of weeks back,the Top Chef finale came on. It recorded on a Wednesday night, but we saved it for Saturday so that we could make wine and food and watch the show. This is something of a tradition for us, but then again we make food every weekend whether or not the show is on, so maybe not. But if you are a foodie like we are, you need to be watching this show - no excuses. That week, I had avoided TWOP and TV Guide so that I wouldn't accidentally see who won - it was a close competition this season between Richard, the best chef they have ever had on the show, and Stephanie, who probably could have won seasons 2 or 3, and could probably only win this year if Richard somehow blew it.
Well, that Saturday night was also the night that Tiger Woods was kicking ass in the US Open, holing out on 17, draining the putt on 18, etc. The phone was ringing - Steph, Cullen, Frank. So, after it is all over, I call Stephanie to recap what Tiger had just done, and was going to mention that she needed to watch Top Chef because we were about to watch the big finale. Here is how that part of the conversation went (warning, spoilers ahead!):
Me: "Steph, there is no reason that you don't watch Top Chef!"
Steph: "I know - I am so happy that Stephanie won!"
Now, she doesn't even watch the show, but somehow was just able to completely spoil what I had waited all week for!!! Well, it wasn't as bad as it seems - it is pretty obvious halfway through who was going to win. (And it still doesn't change the fact that Richard was the best chef ever on this show, with all due respect to Harold.) But still - nothing sucks like when those moments are ruined for you. I have been thinking since then to try to determine the times in my life where I found out the surprise ending to something too early. Books, movies, TV shows, sporting events. I was able to come up with 3 that were the worst for me:
3. HP5 - Entertainment Weekly. I was always slow on reading Harry Potter, and even at book 5 I was still a couple of months behind the rest of the world. HP3 was coming out at the movies, and EW had a large section of an issue about it. Now, it is my fault because I still read the issue, but there was a sidebar in the magazine marked with a "Spoilers ahead" section. Of course, it was not really well marked and I just opened the magazine to one particular paragraph in the spoilers section, and there I read that ****** ***** dies in HP5. I was just livid - I actually ripped up the magazine and threw it across the room. The big ending didn't even remotely have the same impact for me that it should have. Then again, I just should have read it. I mean, I love Harry Potter, but it isn't Proust or anything. I knew that when book 6 came out, I was just going to read it asap, before I even had the chance to have it ruined for me dammit!!
2. HP6 - Seriously, it comes out at midnight on Friday night/Saturday morning, so I go buy it at Meijer. I bring it home and start reading it that night. However, I wasn't going to hole myself up or anything, come on. When I went back to work on Monday, I consciously avoided anything remotely connected to Harry Potter. That morning, I am on the Fark message boards, because the Supreme Court made some sort of decision about something, and seriously, honest to God, on the message boards, someone just posts: ***** kills **********. Just as plain as day, completely off topic. I think I threw up in my mouth a little. It actually made my stomach hurt. It occurred to me that if someone had said that to me in person, I really might have punched them, because I think that it wouldn't be a crime to do so (can I get a ruling on this?). It significantly diminished my enthusiasm for reading the book, to the point that I had already seen an alternate interpretation of the big secret ending that really added a lot to how I read it.
(PS - I finished Book 7 in 3 days. I didn't even go online that Monday.)
1. The 1996 World Cup of Hockey. I was working at Grady's at the time, and was really into hockey at this moment of my life. Up until 1996, this tournament was called the Canada Cup, but this was the first such tournament since I started watching. Well, the finals were the US and Canada, and the final game was on a Saturday night in September. I couldn't get off work, so I set it to tape (actual VCR tape, not TiVo). Well, when I got to work, I basically told anyone who would even remotely care to not tell me who wins the game. This wasn't difficult, being that not that many people watch hockey in Memphis, TN. But everyone knew I watched it, so hopefully they wouldn't tell me if they found out. You know, out of respect. I lucked out because it wasn't even on the TV at the bar, so I couldn't just accidentally see it or anything. Well, the shift was a busy Saturday night, but finally things started to slow down, and I was basically done. I was going to go to the bar to say hi to Jack Speed and order some food to take it home to watch the game. Somehow I had done it - I knew it wouldn't be too difficult to avoid the score, but I was bouncing off the walls in anticipation of going home to watch the game in its entirety. I think I may have even given someone a couple of bucks to roll my silverware so I could go home. Then, I walk up to the bar, and Sean Wiseman is sitting at the end of the bar and turns to me and says, "Hey - did you see that the US beat Canada in the World Cup?" Really, just devastating, only because why is this guy even aware of something that wasn't on the bar TV? Why would he tell me - did I not ask him already to not tell me?
Well, I went home and watched it anyway, and I knew the final score was 5-2, but really until the last half of the third period, it was 2-1 Canada, so yeah, there was the slightest chance that maybe he was wrong. But then the US just reeled off 4 goals to pull away, and it was horribly anti-climactic.
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Post script - I can think of 2 times that I have been the culprit. Once was when Mom was making Ron watch Steel Magnolias, and I walked into the room and just flat out said, "Is this the one where Julia Roberts dies at the end?" Really, totally out of spite, because let's just say that I knew that Mom had seen it, so I wasn't spoiling it for her. But the other time was pure luck - Stephanie and I went to go see the Sixth Sense, and we knew there was supposed to be this "big twist" at the end, so I turn to her right before the movie starts and flat out say the following - "I'll bet the big twist is that Bruce Willis is dead the whole time!' Really though, it was entirely a guess - I had no idea. Midway through, Steph is like, "I really think that you are right!" It saved us the $7 that we would have had to spend to see it again to see how we missed it at least.
What about you? Anything along these lines where you were told the ending when you didn't want to hear it? People who know me well - am I missing anything?
1 comment:
The summer of the HR race, I would tape games while I was at work just in case, and Chip wouldn't tell me anything, just let me watch and see. Then mom actually called me at work in the middle of a Saturday shift to tell me Big Mac hit 62. Then she was mad at me for being mad at her. It was ugly all around!
Oh, I saw who killed Lily in EW before I even saw one episode of Veronica Mars. But that was okay- it was still really good.
The way I remember it is that the Sixth Sense had just started, and he had his first interaction with someone, and you turned and said, I'll bet he's dead! Then the rest of the movie we watched for it. Like when he and Miss Cross had their anniversary dinner, you and I were like, They never touched! She paid the bill because he isn't there! It was fun, actually, so I wouldn't say anything was spoiled.
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