More Judges than Contestants

AI is a sausage fest! Carrie is all, has it ever been three guys before?

Gokey- Wow- TTdH? (Terrance Trent d'Harby?) Nice song choice, Paula! I love this. I would if I knew the song - Paula just picks something that was out when she was still relevant as an artist. I think Gokey did a great job with this song. He knows that dancing and moving on stage isn't his strength, but I worry that he is hiding behind the mic. OK, here he comes. Not too much- it's okay and he sounds great. The judges are horrible. Kara actually criticizes the dancing. She is the judge who is scared the most that Adam won't win. Be objective dude! This is a singing competition! Why are the girls focusing on that? Hey, know who else was horribly awkward on stage? Carrie Underwear. And now she's one of the two or three biggest selling Idol alums ever. Ha! Simon agrees with me that this isn't a dancing competition. Then he takes a shot at SYTYCD. That was weird. And then he and Paula embarrass us all. I am already embarrassed.

Kris- He is so cute I can hardly stand it. This song is not one of my faves, but inexplicably I know it really well. Even Connor says, We know this one! My thoughts on the song can be found in what I said to Carrie - "Hey, I am going to go poop while this is on, but I am going to let it keep playing. Don't pause it." Chip is worried about the falsetto. And Kris just does it the first time around, avoiding it artfully the rest of the time. This is really good, really solid. But most importantly, this sounds like something on the radio today. I actually agree with Randy, which is weird. This is the most contemporary, relevant performance we'll probably get tonight. Chip thinks Kris has a great career ahead of him, and I agree. I find it funny that Kara and Randy are grouped together for this one, and Simon is obviously choosing for the front runner - shows the judges' hierarchy somewhat. Kara is on crack. She is PARANOID that Adam won't win. She will love his next song, regardless of how bad it is. Paula complements Kara with the exact compliment Kara gave her regarding Gokey's song (something about staying in the tone that is best for him). Very original, Paula. She is crazy too. A bad note? I didn't hear it. Simon's t-shirt is covered with Paula's makeup. Klassy. Simon actually calls out Kara, which makes me very happy. Because yeah, don't pick a song for him and criticize him for singing the song. Seriously, what is with the judges tonight? They are horrible. I wanted to like Kara, but she has got to go. This whole dynamic is screwy and they are doing all this mugging for the camera then saying we don't have time for nine songs like we usually do when it's top 3 week. Weak!

Adam- Gag. (I think he has mastered that reflex.) This is horrible-sorry. I mean, each week I give him a chance, then he shrieks that horrible note, flings that tongue around, and generally sounds like Cher doing a cover of a U2 song, and I just can't like him. Carrie - "he sounds like a crying baby." I actually pause it where he has his tongue out - seriously, right now, put your tongue out past your lower lip and try to sing a note. It doesn't help or change anything! It is just creepy! Why are the judges so gaga over him? Kara likes it - wow! No real commentary from her, just some fellation. I'd expect that kind of poor taste out of the American masses, but not Simon- he usually hates this theatrical Broadway crap. Ugh! I hate that he's going to win. BTW - Michigan does NOT love Adam, contrary to that sign.

Carrie Underwear! I just mentioned her! Oh yeah, they totally didn't do the Idol Gives Back this season. Probably with the 4th judge and all or something.

Gokey- Eh. This is okay. His voice is great, but this is putting me to sleep. I thought it was meh, but the judges liked it. I checked my fantasy team while he was on - what is with Jake Peavy this year? I think I might try to trade him.

Kris - Love him! This is AMAZING. Yeah, he takes a terrible song and completely re-does it into something almost palatable. He is the one I want to win, since the best voice in this singing competition left us last week. And Kara, this is why he didn't do this the first time! Duh! He would have been in trouble if he'd done that twice. Chip is blown away. Kris is by far his favorite of this group- I agree, of course. His voice was just flawless. Love him. OK Kara, shut up. He should not have done that both times! So I just tried to vote, and the lines are temporarily busy. Are that many people voting, or are they having problems? I will vote for Kris before this night is over.

Adam- Sigh. Did Ryan just mention Cher? Ha! OK, the "classic" Aerosmith song, Cryin. This is one of their earlier songs, unlike Dream On, which only came out recently. Didn't I make fun of Kara last week for referring to this song in a similarly anachronistic fashion? The back up singer is working for her paycheck tonight- go on girl! This could almost be good, until he starts with the really high notes, which suck. OK, here's the thing. In past seasons, Adam would have really blown away the competition for me. I mean, he is obviously better than Hicks and McFee, Diana Digarmo, etc. However, this season all of the top three are exceptional singers. It's not like the others are duds and he is blowing past them or anything. I can honestly say that of the last three performers, I enjoyed his songs and his voice the least. He's not a bad singer, he is just grating. The other guys have voices that are smoother, and I just prefer their voices. My two cents - I am past the point where I even care. I can't imagine liking Lambert comparative to any other singer I have ever heard. I even prefer this guy. But then again, there is a lot of baggage that goes with each contestant from each season, so I can't say for sure either way. In fact, at the time I think we rooted for Taylor Hicks, but that was before the novelty of voting for the worst wore off. I just feel this year like I don't get the joke. OK, then the judges are like, Please vote for Adam! We like him best! Seriously, I had to go back to read Steph's email to see which one of us wrote that. Simon flat out says, please don't assume that he will be voted in, please vote for him. Whatever- I don't like that.

I guess I'm going to have to text my vote, because I can't get through on my land line and that sucks. And I am going to go watch the Ducks force a game 7. Dammit. Chockley out!