Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Finally the Finale

I love this stuff. I am on my feet clapping for the final two. The kids beg me to stop. Their teenage years are going to be a lot of fun for me. (bwahahahaa) We will be alternating between the TiVo of this and the Wings game. Priorities!

Good vs. evil, cute vs. ugly, guy next door vs. gay next door. We actually had a debate about Lambert's ugliness - I guess I think he is uglier than Carrie does. But yes, I want Kris to win pretty badly. Oh wait, he said "guyliner." Much worse, I think. Nothing wrong with being gay, but guyliner is just embarrassing. This is guyliner - Richard Alpert is just made that way. (Seriously though, every time they show Adam's total jock dad, we immediately blurt out "I love my dead gay son!" It's just a reflex at this point.") This is the first time in Idol history that my very favorite is going against my very least favorite in the finals. It's fun! My favorite is apparently dating Anoop now - good job Anoop.

Lambert- I think he's too theatrical. He bugs me. That said, this was my favorite of his crappy performances. We actually agree - not as much high pitched shreiking. Connor says, "It looks like he's walking on clouds!" Chloe says, "He's not yelling! He always yells!" Ha! Randy - wow, did he steal that outfit off a homeless guy? Is Randy colorblind? Did Scott personally choose this ensemble? Also, somewhere in the AI crowd, a 95 year old Anthony Hopkins is there applauding. What a weird celebrity sighting. Simon agrees with the theatrical. FINALLY. Chip has been waiting for him to say that all year!

Kris- Adorable, perfect, comfortable, smooth, fantastic. Plus, his face looks like that. Love him! Simon calls round one for Kris. Alright! You know, someone sings this song every season. Kris did a really great job, but I was pretty bored during the performance. Also, on my thoery of judges' bias - Randy says, I hope the Lakers win tonight, and you did a good job. Later in the show, Paula will call Adam "iconic". As for Kris? Good luck to Kobe and the Lakers. Just a bang up job by the judges this season. Really, on Thursday, Mary Murphy's blood curdling screams will seem like sagelike advice compared to Randy, Kara, and Paula.

Lambert- Change is Gonna Come. Uh, okay. No kidding. Will Kris be performing Strange Fruit? This is such an important song and so meaningful, the fact that they are having Lambert perform in his over the top, Broadway style is a disgrace to the song. This offends me much more than hard core pornography. Still - one of the greatest songs ever, of course they chose it for Lambert. What does Kris get, We Built This City on Rock and Roll? This suit is my favorite look of his all season, for what it's worth. I'm still not voting for him though. So what's left to say at this point? I love one and hate the other. Let's talk about Randy- this is his best outfit of the season too! Yes, if that is meant ironically! (We talked on the phone - we are really differing on Randy's suit tonight!) Kara says that she liked his interpretation, that you could feel the song - yeah, I got really angry about racial discord from Lambert tonight. Just some great commentary Kara. This is the song Rosa Parks listened to after MLK was assassinated, btw. I know that Lambert is just performing what they are making him perform with this song, so this commentary is more on the show than Lambert, even though I still don't like him. Oh wait, Lambert just started in with the yelling and the tongue, so I feel I need to comment on that. My comment is, Yuck. Put your tongue back in your mouth, and sing rather than shriek. Thanks. OK - we figured it out - Adam just performs, but he has no connection with the song. Carrie said that this is the first time ever that this song did not make her teary eyed. To me, it seems like he is an actor performing a song in a musical, not a singer singing a song at a concert. His disconnect is disconcerting, but at the same time, he would do great in Vegas.

Kris- Pride of Arkansas. . . I'm giving that one to Bill Clinton. But Kris can be second. What's Going On is a perfect choice for his style. Another song that could be on his album. Still though - a weak companion to Lambert's song. And another song that is important historically. Simon Fuller must be a total hippie. Also, I'm not sure I've mentioned this, but Kris is ADORABLE. That crooked mouth thing he's got going is just precious. Loved it. He was good and all, but totally at a disadvantage. He needed a showstopper type of song like Adam got, but he got one that sounded like something that some douche is playing on the quad with his buddies in an effort to pick up some freshman chicks. Plus, my favorite part of each season is when they give a contestant a song they have to sing, then criticize the song choice. Also, I love that Simon's shirt is unbuttoned to his navel. He is hilarious! The kids were like, What's up with his shirt? At dinner they were trying to impersonate his accent. It was awesome. Then I did Phoebe's impersonation of a British accent, a bit that has made Chip laugh consistently for like ten years now. Simon is right - give this round to Adam, but this is no fault of either contestant. The song choices were slanted. Have I mentioned that? Dear Simon: I would love to have Kris in my bedroom strumming along. What is the problem? Oh wait, I see what he's saying.

Lambert- He's going to sing the crappy single like he does, then Kris will sing it like he does, then it's up to us to vote for substance over style. I just hope this song doesn't mention unicorns and rainbows like Cook's coronation song did. Randy says, "You could sing the phone book! That wasn't the best though." BANG UP JOB by the judges tonight. Choice quotes from Chip: "This gives me a headache," and "That was a mess." Agreed. Also, Kara? Buh bye. Simon- Mountains and hurricanes- what? Oooh snap, Kara! But still- no magic rainbows. Next year's song needs to mention leprechauns. Yeah, not much to add here, except for the fact that 8 seasons in and the only winning song I remember is A Moment Like This. I am hoping for Adam to fail, but nothing personal against him, I just need to feel vindicated in the way I feel about him for some reason.

Kris- He just seems uncomfortable at first, and he misses some lyrics. Starts too low because he doesn't have Adam's range. But I don't care, because at least this doesn't give me a headache. It still doesn't make me happy. Also, DAMN Kris - good job on the wife selection! Too bad she is probably all Baptist and puts out once or twice a month. But if Kris wins, I'll smile when I flip past this on FM100. The judges are going to rip this- by far the pitchiest performance of Kris's career. He must hate singing this crap. You know, the few times that he was actually singing the song, he sang it better than Lambert and certainly connected with it better. Chip says, that was a mess too. That song is just a mess! Aw, Simon was sweet to him. And he smiled adorably! He's so cute!

It's 8:40 and I can't get through on the voting lines. I'll keep trying, though! I tried too! Tangent here - they get 3 numbers to call. How do you think the votes fall for each number? Lambert is 01, 03, and 05. Do you think they fall roughly 1/3 for each number? Does 01 get 40% and the other 2 lines get 30% each? Do you think more people call 05, thinking that they will have a better shot, or do they call 03 for the same reason? Do you think 01 is called most because it is first? I feel these are legitimate questions - when a proposal is on the ballot, more people will vote Yes than No, without fully understanding what they are voting for. This is why the wording is so important - also possibly the reason why gay marriage was defeated in California. If someone has an answer about the 01, 03, and 05 question, let me know! Until next season- Chockley out!

1 comment:

Stephanie said...

I sent you another email after this, since Carrie Underwear came out and stepped all over the boys' toys by singing on their night.

You and Chip are so opposed to mixing patterns on your tie and shirt, but that's just how it's done! It's the homemade plastic bead jewelry on Randy that I think is tacky.